Day 27

This week started out with a grouchy Jamie as Aunt Flo visited and made me miserable..... I had to deal with people who were driving me insane.. but all was better today. Today was an amazing day. Tonight I got to go play with C and the ella's They are such beautiful girls and so much fun. As soon as I walked up the oldest said "You are soo pretty" How can you not fall in love with that? And by the end of the night "I love you" was said to me.. I adore those girls. I wished they lived closer. But that also does not help me with the very strong connection C and I have. Maybe it is because we both have had crushes on each other since 6th grade. All I know is you can cut the sexual tension with a knife. We have never kissed. But both are looking quite amazing for 33. He is going to fight in the Police vs Firefighter boxing event coming up. I am super excited to see him in that. We are trying to keep things platonic.. as he needs to get this sluttiness out of his system and get things squared away with the ex. But I was very comfy hanging out with him and those precious girls. A little too comfy. It actually scared me a bit and made me a little sad, that I am ready for that life.. but it is still out of reach.

At least i am not closing myself off to a possibility, I am kinda proud of myself for that :)

Off to sleep now..