Looking inside

Looking inside is rough. To look deeply at something and see the hurts. Know there is hurt but not want to see the root cause. I think our minds progressive t us in ways we don’t know. Is it smart to delve into the parts of your mind that are hidden from yourself? Is it smart or really stupid do investigate the parts that hide for a reason? What if our minds know exactly how much our body, including itself (the brain), can take pain wise.   It’s a conundrum for sure. 

Thoughts?

You control your attitude

https://youtu.be/2VUcj62MbBs

Kindness Matters

Kindness Matters Vlog: https://youtu.be/vcCo9Bqh9Os

Be a decent human

Be kind.  

Be a decent human.  

Treat others how you want to be treated.  

Things that come out of my mouth daily.  Sadly it’s not always my kids I am saying this too. No I have to say it to grown adults who apparently missed manners classes.  Now don’t get me wrong. I do say them to my kids. It cracks up my husband when I say, “be a decent human” to our 3 & 5 year olds. But I feel these lessons need to start early in life. 

Both my lovies, are sweet, kind, generous, and empathetic.  It makes my heart happy to watch them helping others or each other.  But they have a mean streak too.  So sometimes I have to remind them of manners.  It’s my job to teach them and sometimes remind them of their manners and to be a decent human.   

In a world where technology seems to be overtaking every aspect of life. We as a society have grown less empathetic, less patient, less hands on.  We used to learn from our parents how to grow food, make and repair things. We didn’t hire someone to build a fence, we did it.  We didn’t hire someone to fix the car, my daddy did it.  Then we stop teaching basic life skills. We stopped being honest and started being politically correct.  We stopped getting to know our neighbors in person and opt to stalk them online.  We stopped being kind to others. We stopped being patient. We stopped treating others regardless of their job or where they live  the same way we wanted to be treated. And a whole bunch of us just stopped being decent humans.  It’s easy to get caught up in what others have or just wanting to be selfish. I get it.  But where technology and material things fill your life, you become devoid of empathy.  Empathy keeps us human.   Empathy makes us want to treat others kindly empathy helps us be decent humans who are patient and kind.  

I urge you to take a step back and be a decent human. Be kind to others. Leave sweet notes or pay for someone behind you in line. Smile and say hi.  Sometimes just being seen by a friendly face can make someone’s day   Please go out in the world and spread kindness!  

Love

Jamie 

Hysterectomy and Burch -**TMI warning

Some of you followed my cancer journey.  If you didn’t I survived stage 3 breast cancer. Recently I had an abnormal ultrasound of the uterus. So while the doctor was removing my uterus they also did a Burch procedure that helps with me peeing during coughing, laughin, sneezing, tooting... this was done by a robot and was minimally invasive.  Came through surgery well. But found peeing rather difficult.  So I went from peeing myself to not being able to pee. Ironic. Huh?  

So Friday night after surgery we headed back to the er portion of the hospital to get a catheter. After having it removed Monday and passing the drs pee test in which I felt like barely but he said well (he wanted 2 ccs I gave him 12). Still was dribbling. I was assured this was normal and to not strain when peeing 

Okay ladies do you know how hard that is? Especially if you need to poop? You strain a little without realizing if. Well I realized I was straining but my body was like it was in birthing mode. It was like “listen lady you have to poop like your life depends on it”. And while it was cleaning me out, I passed a blood clot in my urine. The damn thing must have been there all along. It just didn’t clog the catheter & couldn’t bypass it either but when there was no catheter but there was pee in my bladder It stopped up the flow. If I laid down I could pee (super convenient) sometimes I could go standing if I moved around. And always could go in the car.. my conclusion is I was able to move it at times to get relief but because of surgery I was to sore to push.  I didn’t have to poop then but when I did the clot came out.  I can pee again. It’s amazing.  Horay for peeing!  So I’m pushing lots of fluids just to keep peeing.

 I’ll never complain about peeing myself again. It’s way better than to not be able to pee at all!  That hurts! Worst form of torture.. and hopefully the only I will ever experience. So don’t tell me secrets as it won’t take much for me to spill them!  But yay for not ever having to worry about uterine cancer, cervical cancer, ovarian cancee, Fallopian tube cancer or to Aunt Flo visiting ever again!  Now that surgery totally worth it. I shouldn’t have doubled down and just stayed the course. 

May peace be with you 

Jamie

Girl wash your face review

I am half way through “girl wash your face”. I swear I could have written it. Well not the stories she tells, obviously those are personal to Rachel and I have my own struggles. But the advice she gives is spot on. So many people wait to be happy, make excuses, tell yourself lies, when the power is there within you.  

This week has been less than stellar. It would make most people curl up in a ball and want to sleep the days away.  My kids have been extra special at night and in the mornings. You know the only time I have with them.  I have screamed at them more than I care to admit. It’s been rough. Some nights I have cried myself to sleep with the promise that tomorrow will be better. And you know what? I woke up and it was slightly better. I didn’t scream as easily. My feathers were not ruffled as much as the previous days. I took baby steps and that’s OK. I improved, I kept my promise.  I was able to step back and realize they needed a connection to me. Especially my oldest, he becomes a terror when not feeling connected.  But even he recognized it. Wednesday he refused to go to school. Normally we would have fought and he would have gone. He wasn’t sick but it was the day after a horrible, no good night. So I said okay. As long as he didn’t bother me while I worked. He promised and delivered!  I was so proud of us both.  He asked for snuggles when he needed it. Laid on the couch and watched transformers. He got alone time, mama time, and a mental break from everything and a physical break from people too. It was an amazing day.

 I love how at 5 he recognized what he needed to be happy and calm. I am proud of myself for starting each day fresh, choosing to be happy, choosing to behave better, choosing not to react so badly. Happiness is a choice. I say this over and over but it’s the truth. You wake up every day and decide. You can wallow in all that has or will go wrong. You can keep complaining about the same things or you can make and keep promises to yourself, you can choose to change things, you can choose to be happy!  

Life is good my friends. Don’t let it pass you by because you keep choosing to be grumpy!  Choose happiness, every  single day!

~Jamie