Post 105 - 2013 Life Changes

My life has changed.  It has changed for the better. I gave birth to a sweet 8lb 10.5oz 21.5 inches long boy.  His entrance into this world started off with a blowing a hole in his lung and having to be separated from me for 2 long days.  Since he's been back in my arms it is really hard to let him go.  I know I should put him down so he sleeps without me holding him but it's so hard to actually do.  His warmth makes my heart smile.  His little grunts. Snores and even hearing him breath makes my heart smile. Even his cries makes me happy.  It means he is healthy.  Plus he sounds like a monkey.  He's by far the best thing his daddy and I have ever done.  He's perfect to us.  He's already stubborn and independent. It's cute to watch but also let's me see our future. I can't stop kissing and smelling him.  I'm a little obsessed.  

I've gone from 2 showers a day to 1; Ralph perfume to au lait perfume; make up to none; yoga pants and tanks as an everyday style; a baby on my hip/chest/arms; cleaning while a baby naps; napping when I can; eating when I can; using the bathroom with a baby in my arms; washing hair once a week (who am I kidding that's normal).

my heart is filled with so much love, more than I ever thought was possible. I am thankful I have the opportunity to spend this time with him while he is so small. I cannot get enough of him. My life has changed (for the better) and I honestly cannot remember my life before him.

Post 104, 2013 Attitude Change

Today, I have not had the best attitude. I have let others affect me, which is silly. I let my frustration take over my mood and body. I have said things without thinking or putting my normal thought into to make sure it doesn't sound snarky or sarcastic. Today I have not cared. Today I let my frustration come through. I reacted, I did not let things roll off. I am not proud if it but it happened. Now I have to pull myself out of it. And I know I know I am 9 months preggo and hormones are flowing through., That should not be a valid excuse. I still should be able to hold my thoughts, control my actions. I just reached that threshold of stress and instead of calming myself, I allowed myself to bubble over.   Every day, hour, minute and second is another chance to start over. If I fail, it is okay I can start over again. As long as I do not stop trying.. I have not actually failed!

Post 103, 2013 Waiting.. patiently

We are waiting patiently for our sweet bundle of joy to arrive. It has been  fun watching my husband get excited when I start having contractions. Though it is odd seeing him so happy I am in pain. I do understand why, he finally gets to meet this little guy and hold him and feel him. I have been lucky I have, talked to him, loved him, kept him safe, felt him move, annoyed him with my poking and prodding. Though I am very content at the moment with just a few frustrations, I am ready to meet him. I am ready to kiss him and hold him and get no sleep with him. I am ready to watch his personality shine through, see whose features he has and will have. I am ready to help mold him into a responsible, caring, funny young man.

Plus the more I await the more I have time to think about the delivery. I have in my head the way things may go, but i really have no idea. For someone who likes to know and plan, this thought is a little scary. I trust my doctors and I know that we will get through this, no matter what. I have let my husband know if anything goes wrong, save our son before me.  I just want him safe!  So I await patiently   not so patiently at times.. but am trying to be patient. I am remembering my coping techinques and talk to him constantly.

Soon very soon we get to meet our little man! I could not be more thrilled and he could not be more loved

Post 102, 2013 The Sweetest Thing

I turn on the tv and The Sweetest Thing is on. It is one of my ALL time fave movies. Cameron Diaz and Christina Applegate and amazing together. They keep me laughing the entire movie and I really get into the characters.  Probably because I was one of them years ago. The girl with the roommates and the best friends who would do anything to support the other, make each other laugh, dance the night away, help each other make bad but fun decisions. Some days I miss those care free days. No worries, responsibilities, just lived life to the fullest and had fun. It was all about fun.  I over committed, got little sleep, was a horrible employee, looked for love in all the wrong palaces, but I had fun.  

As I was watching the movie I looked back at my former younger self and smile. Smile that even though I did not realize it at the time, while I was having fun, I became friends with my now husband. That, the fun times we had, and the memories we shared, stayed with us both, as life took us in different directions. We both wanted the same thing all those years ago, but were too stubborn to admit it, so we let the other go. I am so thankful that we had those memories and all that fun, so that when we came back into each others life, we were ready for the other. We learned from our former selves and knew what we wanted in the other. What was meant to be happened, when we let go of the reins and let life happen. In some ways the movie depicts our life (minus he was getting married when I met him) though the turning point for us, was at a friends wedding, but we dated, then went on to find others, then made our way back to each other.  That movie not only makes me smile for past memories of my former self and hubby, but of the future ones I have with my husband.   I love that we still have fun and laugh. We have been through many stages of life together and apart but the one thing we kept through it all, is our laughter, love for each other and the wanting to have fun.  Even though our fun is wayyyyy different than it used to be!

Remember to smile and laugh a lot. Life is wayy more fun that way!

Post 101 - Thank you goes far

Lately I have been really amazed that simple manners have seem to have gone out the window. From "Thank you", to "Please" to showing up on time and not on a phone. It is crazy how good manners have become non-existent. A simple thank you may not mean that much to you, but it goes a long ways. It shows you took the time to say or write it, that you appreciate whatever the person did for you and really it makes you seem like a nice person. I recently read an article on this, so I know I am not the only one that gets annoyed with the lack of manners that seem to be happening in this day and age.

So remember the next time someone does something even if it is as small as opening a door or your server bringing you a refill on water, say thank you. It will mean a lot to the person.

Post 100, 2013 Corn Maze Fun

Today B and I took the B girls to the corn maze.  We had so much fun today and made some amazing memories. We played in corn, slid down slides, rode the cow train and went on hayrides (which at 9 months pregnant was probably not my brightest idea) made it through the corn maze, fed goats and pigs, petted bunnies and a horse, and laughed a lot.  The girls were worn out and filthy.  As soon as we got home S showered and we watched movies.  The girls were so thankful and so good.  

I love how much they love me, B and tr baby. It makes my heart smile watching B and S interact.  She cuddles with him while watching tv, they rough house and she adores him.  They both do. I love that they love him!  I am so thankful I got this time with them before the baby comes.  They are growing up so fast and no longer need me the way they used too.  E will now be my babysitter instead of me being hers. It's crazy to think we have come full circle! 

It was a good day filled with amazing memories!