I miss my kids

Oh Goodness this experience has taught me how much I love and miss my kids. It hurts how much I miss them. I miss hearing them play and laugh together.

Today is  Herceptin day!

Doctors visit went well. She said my incisions looked great. My blood work is good. My white cells are still low but that is to be expected since I'm still rebuilding from the TCHP cocktail and surgery.  We will start me on a hormone blocker to through me into menopause since Aunt Flo seems to be trying to come back.  And then zoladex for a year at least. Have to get insurance approval then will start probably in 3 weeks at my next Herceptin infusion.

I've been able to snuggle Jax at night which has made me happy and Cass spent most of yesterday with me which made me smile. My emotions have been a roller coaster lately.  I miss the kids, I miss the girls and not being in pain but I love all the love that I've felt!

I'm thankful  for visits with friends and one in particular who made sure I rested while she played with the baby and another who has driven out of her way so many times to be there for me!  So thankful for my sister and brother in law who  have had the kids non stop which has made this seamless for them!

So thankful for my village!  I definitely do not recommend a double mastectomy with lymph node removal when you have small kids at home!  But am so thankful my village has made this more bearable. Not sure how people do this alone!  My sweet husband has been amazing. For someone who is so used to an independent wife, he's stepped up in ways I didn't even realize I needed.

I'm so thankful for my amazing nurses who I look forward to seeing every 3 weeks. I'm thankful for those who took care of me in the hospital and for my amazing drs especially doctor russell. She's amazing on so many levels!  I'm so glad she's mine!!! I would highly recommend her if you ever need an oncologist!

And lastly...Thanks to all who have called, stopped by, sent food/cards/flowers, texted, etc. I am so thankful I do not have to go through this humbling, painful, experience alone!  Here's a pic from today

and one from yesterday (so much love in one pic)

One sweet moment last night. Jax said " mama me miss your boobies. Will they grow back". I told him they wouldn't and I missed them too.  He said " no boobies makes me sad. Me love mama. Me missed mama. Me miss boobies but me love mama".   I'm thankful he won't remember the day to day of this experience but am so proud of how he is handling it all. I got lots of kisses before he snuggled up tight to sleep.

Each day is a little better and one day this will be a distant memory!

Have an amazing Friday and weekend!

Love
Jamie
#fightinglikeagirl #wegotthis #inremission #notgettingridofme #thankful