Today is hard. Today is one of those days that I had a few wins and then one person tries their hardest to suck the life out of you. They do not mean too and you cannot escape them but sometimes they drain you. That was the day today.
The good part is, even though my feelings were hurt and I cried A LOT! I stayed calm, and never raised my voice and by the end of a lot of back and forths, I was apologized too! That right there would never have happened, had I yelled back or shot off comments. It happened because I was finally able to stay calm and let the other person realize why i was feeling hurt.
Some days you have to talk it out. And this is always good! Communication, effective communication, is never a bad thing. Even if the other party doesn't stay calm, you can. You can always breathe, think, and not react. It is hard but with practice, it helps communicating with those who do not communicate well and helps get your point across subtly where they usually will be like "Oh now I see"
This is still a struggle for me. I am usually patient up to a point then I am just done. If I yell it usually means, I have had enough, or I reacted to a trigger. When that happens, it is okay. I do not beat myself up. I do learn from it. I do remember what triggered me. Life is full of lessons, and losing it, is just one more. So is effective communication. We are not mind readers so communication is key in any relationship!
Do you struggle with communication and confrontation?
~Jamie
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